Why "America's Team" Stopped Being Funny
The nickname was not self-appointed, which is the part people forget. It came from an NFL Films highlight reel for the 1978 season — the narrator used it because Dallas games drew crowds in every city they visited. It was an observation about television ratings.
Then they won three titles in four years in the early nineties, and the nickname stopped being a description and started being a claim.
The last one
January 1996. Dallas beat Pittsburgh 27–17 for their fifth title — a genuinely great haul. Only two franchises have more.
They have not been back to a conference championship game since.
What thirty seasons does to a nickname
A nickname earned by winning ages badly when the winning stops. Every January the graphic comes back out, every January it gets a little more awkward, and every year a new group of fans grows up hearing it as a punchline rather than a fact.
That is the actual joke on the shirt. Not that Dallas is bad — they are usually not bad, which is what makes it funnier. It is that the confidence never adjusted.
The shirts
Cowgirls Suck is the blunt one. Front and back print, three colourways, XS through 4XL.
Cowboyz II Men is the one that gets a laugh out of Dallas fans too, which is a higher degree of difficulty and arguably a better result. End of the road, every single January.
Both are printed after you order. Two shirts ship free in the US and take 15% off automatically.