My Ex Is A Certified PAB

The certificate is printed on cotton.

Some people earn the title honestly. This just makes it official, in a font large enough to be read from across a room.

Wear it once, at exactly the right event, and it does the entire job for you.

Fit & fabric

Heavyweight cotton with a classic straight cut — the kind of tee that hangs properly instead of clinging. Ribbed collar, shoulder taping through the back seam, tear-away label. Runs true to size; size up for a relaxed drape.

Printed to order

Nothing sits in a warehouse. Your shirt gets printed after you order it — 2 to 5 business days in production, then it ships. Because each one is made for you, we can only take returns on defects, misprints, or the wrong item arriving. Check the size guide before you order.

Care

Machine wash cold, inside out. Tumble dry low. Don't iron directly on the print. No dry cleaning.